FTMT's Favourite Five Top Tenets

Sunday, March 30, 2014

Vanilla Man

Vanilla Man. 
That's what I am.
 Not one thing or the other just as regular as a slice of Spam. 
All the issues that don't bother, minorities and majorities, 
there's only me, as ordinary as eggs and ham. 
I'm the vanilla man. 

Never had an issue, never felt that strong, 
or argued my position, tried to right the wrong. 
I'm so unaffected, so steady on my feet,
 never guilty, never lifted, I'm the man upon the street. 
Yes I have opinions, but I keep them to myself. 
Got dreams and ambitions but they won't affect my health.
 I consume the usual products, I earn a living wage,
 I read the normal papers, but not quite every page.
 I have romance and glamour, a little in my life, 
I drive within the limit, I know my way round Fife. 

I'm the vanilla man, 
no strong flavours and no strawberry jam, 
no custom options, I don't give a damn, 
If you're lookin' for average then that's what I am. 
Three score and ten not counting. 
A plain vanilla man.
Vanilla Man.

Friday, March 21, 2014

Song nobody listens to

San Franciscan Sour Dough Bread
In my heart and in my head
Want a long life livin' don't want to end up dead

San Franciscan Sour Dough Bread
Red wine red lights red unpronounceable delight 
No necessary evil to take me to the heights 
Of San Franciscan Sour Dough Bread.

Monday, March 17, 2014

Not You

That's not you

I can see why you don’t want to

Go to Marrakesh or Kathmandu

Drinking sheep milk, eating billy goat stew

That just isn’t you

That's not you

Can't quite see you at a festival

Toilet lines and all those chemicals

Surfing crowds and smoking doobie doo

That just isn't you

That's not you

With an aqualung upon your back

Over the side before a shark attack

Immersed in water, the great deep blue

That just isn't you

That's not you

It's 'cos you're one of a kind,  but you stretch your own mind

My Sci-Fi Channel, Chanel No5, a good wine

Chocolate philosophy, pearls before swine

A comfy blanket, taxi home by nine

There's lots of risky things I guess you could do

But that just isn't you

That's not you.

Sunday, March 16, 2014



I'm prepared to be underwhelmed
I'm prepared to be underwhelmed
When the media gets going 

When the forecast says it's snowing

I'm prepared to be underwhelmed

There's a jet plane missing in the clear blue sky

I wish I could help, I can't even try,

They voted for this, so they said at the trial

Here comes the blizzard

Then there is a fire...but

I'm prepared to be underwhelmed

I'm prepared to be underwhelmed.


Wild West Lothian (WWL)

You can get to the moon just staying on the M9


They've got a flying saucer buried in an old shale mine


Drank in a Sevco pub and escaped with my life


So for penance and patience I observe them from Fife


Livin' in sin, making a wish, getting out, talking pish,

Searching for the meaning of life and things, climb to the stars on a pink pit bing,

Walking the canals and fallin' in or playing Mussorgsky on a mandolin,


Everyone else, we get off on your chops


If you can get through the door we'll go out to the shops


I love her deeply and  dirty as the mud in the Forth


Once my sentence is served I will tell her of course


I got my psychometric tests from a guy on Gumtree


So I can stay in the jungle but never be free


Scratching cards, livin' on tick, talking pish, getting sick,

Caught on camera an American  drone  strafes a designer in store in Livingstone,

Loathing the limits on my sin, they let me out so I could find the way in it,


They let me out so I could let you all in.

A better job

you can trample down

you can burn every page

release all your anger

let loose your rage

but love will do a better job
love will always do a better job

you might choose to twist

the knife in your rage

let the anger spit

rattle the bars in the cage

but love will do a better job

love will always do a better job

here am I there are you

see it all what do we do?  x 2

love will always do a better job

Not enough difference

There's a problem in my consciousness

It leads me to these words

Some serious and meaningful

But most remain absurd

I reach into reality 

To salve the mood I feel

But reality steps to the side

And so becomes unreal

flawed, studious and odd

flawed, narrow mind but shoulders broad

flawed, believing everything but god

Here I go, here I go, here we go.

A cat sleeping sideways on my optical prescription

I'm chopping vegetables fighting this addiction

Short sighted writing  reading factual fiction

And the angry men on TV say

Everything has had it's day, revolution, devolution, everyone must pay

I wish I could believe but the arguments just melt away

There's not enough difference today.

Tuesday, August 13, 2013

My world in your eyes

Is it truly true that we will never strain or meet?
Stuck like the toffee people on some greasy street
I had to hurry those words as you stretched the goodbye
And all the time I'm conscious of all the times you tried
My world in your eyes
My world in your eyes.

Saturday, May 04, 2013

2 easy poems

Poem 1:

Make more spunk
You big dumb hunk
Hear Daft Punk
Then get drunk
And get a girl
Go out on the town
Spread it around
And lay her down

That's the way of the world
That's the ways of the world
Repetitious behaviour
Forever and ever
Nothing intervenes or gets between
Drunken celebrated sex
Rock n' roll cheese
Drugs and make believe
And hee-haw else
There's nothing else between.

Poem 2:

I've got my benign nihilism
And I'll take it to the bridge
Talks of claws and manuscripts
Raiders of the fridge
The Guardian and Independent
Opinions matter most
I read but I don't understand
My friend the Holy Ghost
These jumbled words are worrisome
Illiterate and dry
Jesus says “don't masturbate”
But you're too tired to try.

Wednesday, April 03, 2013

Funny Face

Digital suicide
In the silence of your rhyme
We called it sweet despair
Still running out of time.

How the anchors fly
In a storm of hope
How the metaphors
Line up to climb the rope.

Caustic inheritance
From a purse of moths and rags
Sleeping in dirty sheets
All hanging at the back.

How the anchors fly
To pull away the base
Here in infinity
You pull that funny face
You pull that funny face
Just pull your funny face.

Sunday, December 30, 2012

Last shot at 2012

The place of the otherwise forgotten and possibly unmemorable, the hits don't hit anymore and the posts are vague and at best occasional. The design's slipped somewhere, the original good idea has somehow stretched too far, gone to the point of exhaustion and failed to return. It's unfortunate but that happens and sentimentality isn't such a valuable or creative thing that it needs to be nurtured. Another school of thought simply says let it all come round again, puff itself up and on it goes. It goes on and on it goes. Like a Fairytale.

We'll try a little harder in 2013...promise.

Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Didn't see it comin'

All those living in sin and integrity

All those struggling in shame

All those people shouting outside the embassy

All the others calling my name.

I'm your hero in the piles of rubbish

I can be the god of cheese

I am the bullet stuck in the chamber

And I will bring you to your knees.

All those thinking of a better tomorrow

All those busy building up that dream

All those digging graves for their principles

All of those who don't know what I mean.

I am the prophet at loss for an answer

I'm the scum on the MPs sleaze

I'm the curse on the lips of the white witch

And I will see you on your knees.

All those who've kissed the popes and princes

All those with feet held to the fire

All those with pensions, points and penalties

All those chasing small objects of desire.

I'll be your banker, checker and teacher.

I see the flame held to the breeze

I see the swimmer walk on water.

And this will bring you on your knees.

You tend your garden, do what you please, 
You don't see it comin', and it will bring you to your knees.

Thursday, August 16, 2012

Long gone fool

Just under my heart A tattoo for information

If the future’s black Don’t want no resuscitation

Don't try to bring me back, I'm just a long gone fool.

If I can't say your name or meet your eye

Maybe squeeze your hand it's time to say goodbye

Just let it be, let go, whoever's there must know.

Don't try to bring me back, I'm just a long gone fool.

I've had a sweet sweet life clocked up the miles and years

So many good times so no time left for tears

Don't try to bring me back, I'm just a long gone fool.

Pussy Riot

There's not a word dirty enough, to use on you, times are tough.

So don't bow, don't scrape, find a way to escape.

Pussy Riot Pussy Riot

There's not a chord dirty enough, to play for you, times are tough.

So don't dry, don't pray, ship out, run away.

Pussy Riot Pussy Riot.

Fussy Riot Fussy Riot.